It’s You vs. You

Your mind is a powerful tool. What you envision of yourself is what you begin to see. Now this is a topic that has been covered many times, I know. But I myself have struggled with the way I see myself, and I know others who tell me daily that they struggle the same.

When I started working out it was purely for emotional release. The gym gave me a place to let go of my stress and any anger I held on to. But as time passed I started focusing on myself physically. Now, I struggle with being a perfectionist, and this is something I have learned to let go of; which I believe is also what helped me through this time in my life. This is something many of us go through, but never open up about.

I am choosing to share this because I have had many people confide in me; and when I share my experience with them, they see a new light they hadn’t seen before. I know there are many others out there, men and women, going through the same struggle who need to hear this. I am also human, I am not perfect; and I want you to remember that. Because it took me a long time to see what everyone else saw.

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Sometime after University, when I was well into my first career, I began to analyze every part of myself. I felt as though I should look so much leaner based on the fact that I had been working out consistently for five years or more – Coming to the conclusion that there was nothing I liked; I became obsessed with the scale and my eating habits. I restricted myself while working out twice a day. I was eating just enough and taking supplements to make me smaller-a lot of them. I was miserable and irritable. In a relationship at the time, I was able to hide it from the one person who saw me every single day outside of work and the gym. I thought weighing less and being physically smaller would make me happy and more confident, but it had the opposite effect; I was depressed and extremely self-conscious. There are some people close to me who will be shocked by reading this, but I also believe they will understand.

I had periods where I would gain the weight back and periods where I would shrink back down. I was my smallest at 112 lbs. When I came back to 125 lbs I was stalled there. So I became harder on myself, ashamed that I worked so hard for all these years and had nothing to show for it – at least that’s how I felt. I want to point out that 125 lbs is a healthy weight; but my mind clouded what was truly there, and what I saw was something I had created in my mind and a very different version of reality.

So what helped me? How did I shatter the false vision I had of myself? I told someone.

I told the guy I was living with at the time. I needed him to know so I could be accountable to him. I needed someone to be there so I didn’t continue over-dosing on supplements and harming my body just to achieve some look that I thought would make me happy. Was I even happy at 112 lbs? NO. Is that even a healthy weight for someone my height? NO.

During that time in my life 134 lbs would have bothered me. And through this process it did. I struggled with gaining weight but I also wanted to be stronger and I wanted to be healthy. So I made a choice and learned to see myself differently. I changed my focus. I set goals that had nothing to do with the way I looked. I set goals based on my strength and events I wanted in my life. Eight years of lifting and I am finally increasing my strength and improving my mindset. It took me a long time, but I had no one to guide me; so I am here to guide you and help hold you accountable.

Truthfully, I do not look that much different at 134 lbs. It’s amazing what muscle can create and how our minds can so easily elevate us and defeat us. I train hard and I eat healthy foods for the most part. At a 20 lb difference, I’m relatively the same size. I still where all the clothes I wore before. Am I shaped differently now? A little. Where I gained, was where I was intentionally building muscle on my body. Am I happier nd more confident now? More than I have ever been.

Today, I finally see what everyone else can see. A number is a number and nothing more. It does not rule you or have power or control over you unless you let it. Learn from this, because only you can change how think and feel. No one can change the way you feel about yourself, only you can.

So here’s my challenge for you:

1. Forget the Scale – Once a month fine, but not everyday; this should not be your main focus. Take body measurements instead. Set goals based on your endurance, strength and power, not your weight.
2. Compliment someone genuinely – because that one moment could change their entire mindset.
3. If someone compliments you, say thank you. Don’t automatically down play it or say that it can’t be true. It is true.

 

Where we focus our energy is where we will grow and succeed. 

This is my Life

I made this my life because it’s my passion, simple.

So many people wonder why I gave up what I had to be here. Alternatively, some believe I make easy money. If it was about money, I would have never left the career I previously built for myself. I don’t believe in doing anything just for the money and I sure as hell didn’t chase this career thinking it would be easy.

I live to help and encourage others. I will give all the energy I have just to see people smile and to watch them succeed. I spent 7 years in a gym before I figured out what actually worked for me and before I learned how to properly set up and program my workouts. Do you really want it to take that long? Or would you rather spend a year with me and be self sufficient within the first year?

I want to see people live for themselves, not for society. I want to see people learn to love themselves when they thought they never could. I want to see people make fitness a lifestyle, not a quick fix. I want to see you change your life and be proud of it. I want to help you reach your true potential, something you never thought was possible.

If you’re willing to give 100%, I will give you 100% right back. Someone once told me, if they could do it for free, they would; I agree. But money will always be a component of many things in life. What you must realize, is that this is an investment in your life, in your health. If you could put a price on your life, would you? Your health, your happiness, it’s invaluable.

This was never about money, it was about YOU – because you are worth so much more than you give yourself credit for, trust me. I made this my life so I could change yours.

WHY?

Patience and Consistency are key. When you want something, you need to work for it; but you also need to figure out WHY you want it.
What will this do for you? How will it make you feel? How will this benefit you and your life?
So why do I want to Squat, Deadlift, or Hip Thrust so much weight?
Because it teaches me patience, which is something I lack. When I want something, I want it now. Do I want to lift 315lbs tomorrow, yes I do. Will I? No. Working towards my goals has taught me how to slow down, take my time, and do it safely. Training your body should help you mentally, physically, and spiritually. It also gives me a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction that I can’t replace. It shows me that the training I put in day in and day out is worth it. My body is growing and getting stronger. I am breaking my own plateaus and improving my mindset.
This is my WHY.
So today, I want you to ask yourself WHY you want this. Why did you choose the goals that you have? Because once you figure that out, consistency will follow.